At long last my life is starting to settle down out of the holiday bustle, which is largely imposed on me by others. This is a particularly exhausting time of year for me, and I suspect that only some of it is the rushing about I invariably have to do every year. As my spiritual practise has been deepening, I'm beginning to realize a much closer connection to the Sun that I really understood as a BabyPagan. Not that I don't love the Moon. The Sun and I have always had a love-hate relationship. I burn to a crisp every summer because of my fair Irish skin, unless I slather myself in SPF 90, which keeps me quite pale. But I love to watch motes of dust drifting through a sunbeam, and much like a cat, I do love finding a sunny spot to nap in, provided it's not in my eyes. As I work with the gods of the Unnamed Path, and especially as my relationship with the Light God deepens, I find myself missing the sunlight. I'm more and more tired in the evenings, and especially so as the year has waned. This is very strange for me, because no matter what my work schedule is I'm usually such a night person.
I'm struggling through my spiritual practise right now, through a feeling of lethargy and sluggish energy. I'll get through it - I always do. Right now my focus is on completing the half-done tasks all around me, and continuing to commune with my People. For now that will have to do.
Showing posts with label journeywork. Show all posts
Showing posts with label journeywork. Show all posts
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Lions and Tigers and Psychics Oh My!
This weekend was kind of a blur for me.
Got off work early on Friday, went home and took a nap for a few hours, then bought more Magic cards and got to work with those.
Saturday I finally got contacted by T, and she, her husband, and another of their friends came to pick me up. We went to lunch at Fadi's here in Houston, and it was actually really tasty. Then we went back to their house, where T's husband conked out on the couch, and she and I went upstairs to play dress-up.
Yeah, I know.
But in all seriousness, we were gearing up for that night. I got to go read Tarot cards for the Glass Slipper Gala at the Alley Theater. It was SOOOO much fun. I was totally rocking this Adam Lambert-goes-to-Ren-Faire thing. With ginormous butterfly wings. I read cards and flirted, though I didn't get any numbers or anything. It was so great to be able to get back into doing readings like that again. I felt like I'd run a marathon after I was done, though. Thankfully I have People for that...the Light God and I were having conversations all night.
"I've got nothing."
"She's blocking you. Here. *tweak*"
"Holy crap. <finish reading, girl bursts into tears> It'll be okay honey. Have a better evening!"
"This woman is drunk, and obviously in an emotionally fragile state. I've made one girl cry, I'm not running another off a balcony."
"Look I just give you the message. You don't want to convey it, that's all you."
Ultimately, I was exhausted emotionally and physically, but really mentally energized, and VERY much psychically WIDE OPEN. I didn't really get that to shut back down to 'normal' until this morning. And even then I can tell that I'm still more open that I normally am.
And really I'm okay with that.
I've been doing a lot of work on making myself ready to allow love into my life. I deleted all the pictures of the last cute guy off my phone; actually, all of the pictures of guys off my phone, and off both computers. I spoke to M, who I still had feelings for, and finally got him to say that he felt that we should be friends right now. Now I have all this extra energy, so I've been running that as suggested by Sphinx. It's actually a really good-weird feeling, feeling like I'm running on full throttle, until I get everything sort of equalized. Then I am still running stronger, but there's no strain, it's just more smoothly flowing energy. When I get home tonight I'm getting my room clean and doing journeywork. I need to talk to some People more face to face. I've slipped back into the habit of falling asleep when I try and travel if I do it in my bed, and that's not going to work.
Now I really just need to do it and to catch up on my rest.
Got off work early on Friday, went home and took a nap for a few hours, then bought more Magic cards and got to work with those.
Saturday I finally got contacted by T, and she, her husband, and another of their friends came to pick me up. We went to lunch at Fadi's here in Houston, and it was actually really tasty. Then we went back to their house, where T's husband conked out on the couch, and she and I went upstairs to play dress-up.
Yeah, I know.
But in all seriousness, we were gearing up for that night. I got to go read Tarot cards for the Glass Slipper Gala at the Alley Theater. It was SOOOO much fun. I was totally rocking this Adam Lambert-goes-to-Ren-Faire thing. With ginormous butterfly wings. I read cards and flirted, though I didn't get any numbers or anything. It was so great to be able to get back into doing readings like that again. I felt like I'd run a marathon after I was done, though. Thankfully I have People for that...the Light God and I were having conversations all night.
"I've got nothing."
"She's blocking you. Here. *tweak*"
"Holy crap. <finish reading, girl bursts into tears> It'll be okay honey. Have a better evening!"
"This woman is drunk, and obviously in an emotionally fragile state. I've made one girl cry, I'm not running another off a balcony."
"Look I just give you the message. You don't want to convey it, that's all you."
Ultimately, I was exhausted emotionally and physically, but really mentally energized, and VERY much psychically WIDE OPEN. I didn't really get that to shut back down to 'normal' until this morning. And even then I can tell that I'm still more open that I normally am.
And really I'm okay with that.
I've been doing a lot of work on making myself ready to allow love into my life. I deleted all the pictures of the last cute guy off my phone; actually, all of the pictures of guys off my phone, and off both computers. I spoke to M, who I still had feelings for, and finally got him to say that he felt that we should be friends right now. Now I have all this extra energy, so I've been running that as suggested by Sphinx. It's actually a really good-weird feeling, feeling like I'm running on full throttle, until I get everything sort of equalized. Then I am still running stronger, but there's no strain, it's just more smoothly flowing energy. When I get home tonight I'm getting my room clean and doing journeywork. I need to talk to some People more face to face. I've slipped back into the habit of falling asleep when I try and travel if I do it in my bed, and that's not going to work.
Now I really just need to do it and to catch up on my rest.
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